NaPoWriMo day 26
The Foul and the Bully-rat were put out to sea
On a manky-scant wee boat
They were thrown some spitballs, catcalls tar and feathers for good measure
Wrapped up in a cautionary note
The Fowl growled up to the stars above
With a sound like a small chainsaw
You, Bully-rat, you fat hunk of shite
Gimme room in this boat, oar,
I’ll haul your arse out!
Said Bully to Fowl, you evil great bleep
How charmingly sweet you bleat!
We’re in this together, you’d better not blether
Oar, I’ll cut your throat while you sleep!
They floated this way for a year and a day
To the land where the spliff trees grew
And there in the woods, a beautiful woman stood
They puffed up their chests and and jousted their jests
All to impress their importance upon an isolated female
Soon to be in their thrall. What a boon!
But she saw straight away they were
Up to no good
Up to no good
Though they begged so sweetly for fun and for food.
They warbled, aw, darlin’ It’s probably you’re also hungry for a fine feast of a man , we’re a bit wobbly but
honey girl, would you give us a whirl as a nibble
Supply us some vitals and a sniff of your spliffs, we’ll all bob along well, we can tell
But the woman was wise to all of their lies
She’s smelt them coming for miles and miles
So, she called on the conch to the other girls of her tribe, and they had them split-toasted in a flash, for their ladies lunch.
And hand in hand they danced
By the light of the moon
But the light of the moon
Full-bellied and stoned, they pranced
They licked the fat from their fingers and runcible spoons be damned!
btw April 26, 2021
parody picked from the teeth of the Owl and The Pussy-cat, loosely and unabashed.
And now for our (optional) prompt. Today, I’d like to challenge you to write a parody. Besides being fun, writing parodies can be a great way to hone your poetic skills – particularly your sense of rhyme and sound, as you try to mimic the form of an existing poem while changing the content. Just find a poem – or a song – that has always annoyed you, and write an altered, silly version of it. Or, alternatively, find a poem with a very particular rhyme scheme or form, and use that scheme/form as the basis for a poem that mocks something else.
If you’d like to get some inspiration, you might consider some of the poems that Lewis Carroll included in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, which parody the moralistic verse of Isaac Watts. For example, “The Crocodile” is a send-up of Watts’ “How Doth the Little Busy Bee,” while “Tis the Voice of the Lobster” is a parody of Watts’ poem “The Sluggard.” Or, for a briefer and more whimsical poem, consider “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Bat,” which is a parody of “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.”
The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea
In a beautiful pea-green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five-pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
“O lovely Pussy! O Pussy, my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
What a beautiful Pussy you are!”
Pussy said to the Owl, “You elegant fowl!
How charmingly sweet you sing!
O let us be married! too long we have tarried:
But what shall we do for a ring?”
They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the Bong-Tree grows
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood
With a ring at the end of his nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose.
“Dear Pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling
Your ring?” Said the Piggy, “I will.”
So they took it away, and were married next day
By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince, and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a runcible spoon;
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,
They danced by the light of the moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.